Keeping Up With The Joneses

they call me Monk

The limit was finally reached as it pertained to the number of times I had to replace my left iPod ear bud while exercising. Being required to constantly replace the bud in my ear has been hampering the rhythm of my workouts. It has also led to gossip among my fellow fitness center visitors as they discuss the nervous tick during which I constantly touch my left ear. They have started calling me Monk, after the main character on USA Network's "Monk". For those who have not seen that show, Monk is a detective with Obsessive Compulsive Disorder (OCD). The opening of the show has a scene of Monk walking down the street and he can't resist touching all of the parking meters. 

My left ear has always given me problems from a ruptured ear drum to hearing loss, so I am adding insufficient ear canal size to the list of complaints. I have no complaints about my right ear. When I reached the limit this week, I stopped by Target on the way home to locate some ear buds with some sort of clip. I found some black ones with pink clips to help show how girly I am, especially since I rarely feel very girly at the end of the workout when my hair is wet and hanging in my eyes. Maybe I need a pink clip for my hair as well.

I have not tried out the new buds yet during an actual workout, but I tried them on and they seem to be pretty secure. Hopefully, I can retrain my left arm to stop touching my left ear canal since it has become somewhat of a habit. That may be why my left bicep looks so much more defined than the right one.

tornaduh

Like many in the Southeastern section of the States, I was awakened from my Sunday night slumber by a tornado siren. For future reference, let me explain that if the intention is to have me make a quick decision and act on it (also quickly), these things should be planned for my normal awake time. Forget this early morning stuff.

I neglected to catch the local nightly news, during which the impending situation was most likely discussed. By the time the siren awakened me, I was in deep sleep mode. At first, I thought there was a fire engine on a nearby highly-traveled road. This is fairly common. A few moments later, I realized that the siren did not grow louder or softer as it would if a fire engine was coming toward me or going away. Even more time passed.

Adding this to the sound of rain and wind outside, a light bulb finally went on inside my head. I slowly found the remote and turned on the television to find a tornado warning in the area. With pillow, comforter and cell phone with an alarm set (in case of outages), I tried to make myself comfortable in the hallway that I previously dubbed the safest area during such storms. I set my cell phone alarm because I had an 8 a.m. meeting, if I was not blown away.

I remembered a time when I lived in Memphis on the top floor of an apartment building during a late night tornado warning. That time, I told myself I was just too tired to move. Everything was fine, but I dreamed I woke up and saw the sky because there was no roof to the building. Everything was fine last night also. I was not able to fall asleep on the floor in the hallway, but could tell when the danger diminished and returned to my bed, which was way more comfortable.

Although I say that I am better during the awake hours, I am not much better when the sirens go off near our office building during the work day. We can barely hear the sirens from the Vanderbilt campus across the street. Usually if I hear them, I have to ask my coworkers if they hear that sound or is my tinnitus acting up again.

time travelin'

On Thursday, I had my first experience at Buca di Beppo, an Italian restaurant. I had heard mostly good critiques from friends and have passed this particular location quite often, but had not made a stop. AB had an errand next door to the restaurant. I tagged along and we went to Buca afterward. Walking into the restaurant was like walking back in time to the 50s. For those who may be wondering, let me clarify that I was not around during the 50s.

On the way to the table, we were taken through the kitchen. The waitress said that is a normal routine there. I can't really recall another place that does that. I guess it helps those who may wonder what goes on in the kitchen area and what it looks like. In the brief walk-by, we were greeted by a chef or waiter. I could only tell that he was friendly.

The walls were covered with photos, posters and paintings. Many were of people enjoying Italian dishes and photos of Frank Sinatra were scattered here and there. There were plenty of conversation starters if a conversation were to stall. We did figure out that some of the photos were repeated, which I thought was smart because customers are most likely not going to go through the place and compare photos. Our clue to this was seeing that one of the photos above our table was also displayed in the pink and white tiled bathroom. I kept wondering how long it takes the interior designer and crew to get one of these restaurants set up.

Italian music from days gone by was piped into the restaurant and was especially loud in the bathroom. It was at an appropriate level in the restaurant serving only as background to conversations. They serve family style, authentic Italian food (from what I could tell). We shared the Antipasto Salad and the Baked Ziti, which were both magnifico.

I love Italian food and have found myself drawn to those of Italian descent. I asked the waitress if they had a location in Memphis because I have several Italian friends who live there and would love the ambiance and cuisine of this place. I was told they are building one in Memphis, but the new location was not communicated. I will definitely be going back to eat at this restaurant. It is a chain and I think the waitress said there are 400 locations. If there is one in your area, don't miss an opportunity to go there. I give it two thumbs up. I would give it more, but I only have two.

cross that bridge

Back in August when I test drove my Mustang, it was 98 degrees. It felt great with the top down and the air on. Back in August, it did cross my mind, albeit briefly, that this is not the kind of car that will do well during a snow or ice storm. If I lived further north than Nashville, I would not have even considered it. Even though I had trouble with my front-wheel drive car the last couple of years during the Winter months, I ignored the warning signal sounding in my head and decided I would cross that icy bridge when I came to it.

We had our first snow today. Although it was not much to talk about, it was enough to make me nervous on the ride home. Last night, I packed a small bag of essentials such as a toothbrush, contact solution, bottle of wine, etc. O.k., I am kidding about the wine. O.k. I am kidding about kidding about the wine. My inclement weather plan is to call my brother from work and have him pick me up on the way home from his office (I am on the way, which helps) so I could spend the night at his house. He does not know about this plan yet. If he is reading this - You know you are my favorite brother! You know I would say that even if I had other brothers.

There were a few moments on the ride home that caused my knuckles to turn white, but I safely made it home. We have had a mild Winter so far and I hope that is the case until Spring. Are we there yet? As is the case a majority of my awake time, I have had a song playing in my head since I left work. The song of the moment? "Slip Slidin' Away" by Simon and Garfunkel with the chorus of "Slip sliding away, slip sliding away; You know the nearer your destination, the more you slip sliding away." It was playing loudly in my head as I approached the big hill (near my destination) I have to conquer to get into my neighborhood.

reset

I am thinking, perhaps, that my nephew has got mo' smarts than I do when it comes to electrical things since he is studying electrical engineering. One of my uncles knew about all things electrical, but I am not sure I got enough of those genes from my mother's side. These statements are based on events from earlier today.

I do know more today than yesterday (for anyone my age and over, I know you are now singing "More Today Than Yesterday" by the Spiral Starecase - that is how to spell it...look it up). Since I hired some guys to stain my deck recently and the light they used did something to the plug on the deck, I have had some electrical issues. The issues included a plug in my garage and a plug in my master bath. The master bath one has been the most inconvenient, but I postponed getting it looked at until the holidays were over.

When I returned from Kentucky after the holidays, I tried flipping the breakers back and forth, as suggested by the men in my family. That did not work. So today, Ezekiel (from Hebrew meaning strength of God), the electrician who looked like he was in a grunge band, stopped by to assist with my issues. I expected to hear that I had major problems. It turned out that I just needed to reset the ground fault circuit interrupter (GFCI) outlet in the guest bath because it is connected to the master bath plug and reset the deck plug that was connected to the garage plug (the thigh bone's connected to the hip bone...). In just minutes, everything was back in working order.

I felt pretty dumb as Ezekiel explained, "Most building codes require a GFCI in areas around water sources." All I heard was, "Most building codes, blah, blah, blah." I'M A GIRL, WOMEN, WHATEVER!

I do know about the reset button and if there had been a GFCI in the master bath, I would most likely have figured that out. Admittedly, I did not know it was called a GFCI until today. It is still not clear why the master bath does not have that type of outlet since it does indeed have water sources. I don't go into the guest bath much and I have not audited the outlets throughout my house. Life throws me curves sometimes, but they say that is how we learn about stuff. Boy, have I learned some stuff!

Later in the day I thought that a reset button that solved all issues sure would come in handy in other areas of my life.

talkie-walkie

Mundane activities required for adult life have the potential to turn into unexpected opportunities for entertainment. As I arrived at my car dealer to get an oil change Thursday morning, I was directed to the waiting area where six other customers were waiting on their cars to be serviced. The lounge had wi-fi so I got out my work laptop to do a little work while I waited. Most of the folks in the room were occupying themselves with hand-held electronic devices, magazines or the television.

As I waited for my computer to boot up, I glanced around the room. My eyes fell upon the only man who was just sitting. He resembled Santa, but I knew the real one was resting at the North Pole after the grueling Christmas journey. Our eyes met and of course that opened the door for him to start a conversation.

We talked about the weather and a few other topics, all initiated by Santa. During this time, he mentioned that he did not understand people's fascination with their phones and other electronic devices, especially in restaurants. He glanced at my laptop and another customer's Kindle. He left a few moments open in case I had a response. For this subject, I told him that my job requires that I use a computer and I don't really take it to restaurants unless I am alone. I am usually focused on the company and the food, rather than anything electronic.

Our conversation went on for a while, but my computer was ready for me to do some work so I gradually quit responding with anything more than a yes, no or maybe. As the conversation faded, Santa stood up and went outside.

"He's a chatty one," I said in the direction of the Kindle man who was sitting the closest to me.

He replied, "Yeah, I have been in here a while and his pattern is to engage whoever enters. There comes the point that the conversation fades and he walks out. He did not get very far with you, but I have found out that he thinks he is an expert on just about everything."

I hope that the talkative man was not really Santa and that his reason for going outside had nothing to do with preventing me from seeing that he marked my name off of the nice list. I would hate to be marked off this early in the year. Although, I guess that means I have almost a year to make up for it.

just say no to the first Wednesday

Since the holidays started, I have been having a hard time keeping track of my days. Now that I have gone back to work and starting the week on a Tuesday, I am still confused...so confused that I did something I never do. I went to Kroger on the first Wednesday of the month. That is a day that seniors get extra discounts (and I don't mean those who are in their last year of high school or college). I have a few more years before I qualify for these discounts, although some of you are probably thinking I am there already.

When I pulled into the parking lot, I realized my error in judgement but also remembered the bareness of my pantry. I was out of town over the holidays and had not stocked my shelves or fridge for that reason. To make the best results out of the situation I found myself in, my strategy became - find the oldest couple and make a deal for them to get the items on my list for me and get their discount. I said I would meet them outside and went to read in my car. I now have to go feed their cat this weekend and drive the older man to the dentist on Monday. I even surprised myself at the lengths I will go to get a discount. They got the wrong kind of Cheez-its® though. I had it clearly written on the list.

That last paragraph is all make believe. I did not take advantage of anyone. I did my own shopping, but cut my list in half to save some time. Even with the shortened list, today's visit ended up taking a lot longer than most of my grocery visits. The aisles were crowded and there were lines at the registers. This is most likely the last time I make this mistake...well, until I reach the age that I get the discounts.

eye candy

After seeing Daniel Craig in The Girl with the Dragon Tattoo, I continued my weekend of viewing nice-looking (aka HOT!) men on the big screen on Sunday when I went to see Sherlock Holmes: A Game of Shadows. It stars Robert Downey, Jr. and Jude Law, two actors who are very easy on the eyes. I went to the theater with a couple of friends, who knew about the loud people sitting next to me during my previous movie viewing. They were incredibly quiet and I only had to shush them once.

We paused a few times in the lobby since there were some large, plastic chipmunks marketing Alvin and the Chipmunks: Chipwrecked. My friend Chip wanted to get his photo made with them, but we were running late. Then, we saw the machine that allows people to dance with some guidance from a computer screen. Too bad we were running late. Everyone knows I have always wanted to show my dance moves in a theater lobby.

I enjoyed the movie and there was a connection to The Girl with the Dragon Tattoo other than the hotness of the male leads. The female lead in Sherlock Holmes was the actress who played Lisbeth Salander in the Swedish film versions of Stieg Larsson's trilogy. She looked a little different in this movie since the character of Salander was a very unique-looking girl. Jared Harris plays the villain and is very convincing. Some may know him as Lane Pryce from AMC's "Mad Men". LT told us that he is also the son of the late Richard Harris.

It was not the most thought-provoking movie I have seen, but it was fun to watch. The special effects were pretty amazing. Guy Ritchie (aka Madonna's ex) directed the movie and included a lot of speed ramping, during which the action is slowed down and sped up. I liked seeing the slowed-down version as Sherlock thought about how he might defend himself during some of the unavoidable fights. The actual fights would take place and be so fast that I would not have followed the blows without the slow motion preview.

The first Sherlock Holmes movie is not a prerequisite for this one. So, even if you missed the first installment, I recommend seeing this one. It will not disappoint if you are looking for an action-packed flick with some eye candy for each eye, unless you have a third eye. Blinky, a three-eyed fish from "The Simpsons", might be disappointed. A third eye can also mean you are enlightened, which means you probably would not go see this movie anyway.

Craig’s list

I went to see a movie today since I am still on holiday vacation. When I got home, I immediately checked to see what movies Daniel Craig has been in. Somehow, I have missed that he could be described with three letters and a symbol – HOT! Most of the movies on his list have not been on the list of movies I have seen. That explains how I have missed those blue eyes that made me say “wow” in my head when he appeared on the big screen. I could have said it out loud, which was apparently acceptable by the two older couples that sat by me. They talked a lot during the movie and I listened to the movie a lot with a finger in the ear that faced them.

Since I was distracted by their talking and noisy bag of candy that they snuck into the theater, it was good that I knew the plot of The Girl with the Dragon Tattoo. I have read all three books by Stieg Larsson about the escapades of his characters Mikael Blomkvist and Lisbeth Salandar. Not only did I read the books, but I saw all three of the movies that were made in Sweden. I had to view the dubbed-in-English versions, because I have yet to learn Swedish. There is still time for that. This version was way better because the lips were synchronized with the sound.

Other than the talkative, plastic bag rattling folks next to me and the length of the movie as it related to my bladder, I really enjoyed it. There are some not so pleasant scenes in the novel and the movie, but good prevails against evil. That usually makes for a good novel and movie based on said novel.

A couple of previews I saw today made me mark some movies off my list. The Devil Inside preview gave me a mini-migraine just watching it and I don’t think I could watch 2 hours of a documentary-style film about exorcism. Another preview for Extremely Loud and Incredibly Close starring Tom Hanks and Sandra Bullock made me get teary eyed just in the few minutes it was on the screen. It revolves around a boy who lost his dad in the September 11 tragedy. I will have to watch that one at home with a family-sized Kleenex® box for each hand.

taking a break

While in Kentucky for Christmas, I took my cousin for a ride in the Mustang. Our ride was at dusk and as we came around a curve, we saw four deer on the right side of the road. One ran across in front of us, but thankfully I saw it in time. An impact would not be good for the deer or my car.

The one that crossed the road joined four others on the left side of the road. There were eight deer total. It was quite a sight. Could it be that Santa's reindeer (sans Rudolph) take a break after their annual journey and relax in my hometown? That is probably not the case, but you never know. Kentucky is not a bad place to relax.