A friend at work, K, and I were discussing a new opportunity for bridesmaid parties since Nashville is now high on the list of destinations for such celebrations. The new venue is also known as a shooting range. We agreed that the drinking segment of the evening should not precede the handling of the guns. This conversation led to talking about guns in general, and then led to talking about hunting.
Me: "Does your husband hunt?"
K: "He only hunts hogs because there are too many of them, especially in Texas."
Note: My ears were stopped up and what I heard her say was "hawks".
Me: "Are they edible?"
K: "Oh no, they are nasty. The hunting is just to decrease the numbers since they wreak havoc on farmland, livestock, small animals and the overall environment. They root in the ground and are really gross."
Me: (still thinking she is talking about hawks) "Are they like crows?"
K: "No, they have big snouts and some get up to 500 pounds."
Me: "Hold up. Are you saying 'hogs' or 'hawks'?"
K: "HOGS!"
Me: "Makes sense now. I have not been to Texas much and was not going to return if 500 pound hawks were flying around. Can you imagine the power and wing span required to get that many pounds airborne?"